Day Sixty-six: Anybody there?

Yes, I am grossly behind. Yes, I have partly completed entries for about a week. And I'm exhausted. And getting sick. And I don't want to be a whiner. But I have to start somewhere.

I have to admit that I laughed really hard today when I got my daily email of who was in SMARTS (our school's version of ISS). Eight students, six of which were mine. One of them is actually one of my best students. She's been skipping other classes. But she always comes to mine, always works, and usually is able to get other kids to work with her that normally don't want to do much. She's basically a rock star. AND my student of the month. I tried to break her out, but she went home early.

Today at our end of lunch assembly our principal led us in a moment of silence. Last night a 13 year old boy was stabbed after an altercation (it was all over the news last night). He was a part of our school district, and it hit a little close to home. He probably would have ended up at our school within the next year or two.

One of the boys from my 2nd period class finally came back from SMARTS today. I haven't seen him in weeks. And I welcomed him with a big smile and let him know what was going on. And what happened? He worked. And I tried not to fall over. I don't think I did anything, but this is the same kid who I told once that if he just completed one assignment, I'd take the entire class to the game room for a class period. So it looks like I get to follow through now. Awesome.

In 4th period, I spent most of the time following one of the boys around the room, trying to give him options of what he could do, and taking things out of his hand before he broke something or hit someone with a ruler he picked up. Yay kindergarten! Need to find a new tactic tomorrow.

Day Sixty-five: The dinosaur in the room

Today I battled starting to feel sick with total excitement about the decorations we are working on for the Christmas party. Most of the day was a blur, except for a moment at the end of the day.

After school today one of my students came by with the custodian to help clean the classroom. (She needed community service hours). I started talking to her about how awesome the party was going to be because of what they were all helping with.

Student: Miss, you remind me of Barney.

Me: The dinosaur?

Student: No. Barney Stinson on How I Met Your Mother. With your attitude.

Me: (After I stopped laughing) It's going to be legend-wait for it-dary!

Day Sixty-four: Next project

Yes, I'm behind on posting, and I have a few days partially written. We all need a holiday, right? I'll catch everyone up soon.

It was so nice to have a break for a few days.

Today we started making these. They are these really cool Christmas ornaments made out of string. All you really need it the string, glue, water, and a balloon. I tried a few different methods of glue+water+string, and the messiest option seems to be the best. Dipping the string in the glue causes knots and a weak structure. Painting on the glue after wrapping the string is almost a guaranteed collapse. Sticking your fingers in the watered-down glue and spreading it on the string right before wrapping it around? Winner! Tomorrow I'm going to try to make a larger version to hang from the ceiling using thicker thread and beach balls.

Day Sixty: More?

Today a few of my students started sharing project ideas. By the end of the day, I asked, "I'll give you two options. Would you like to start your projects or help me make snowflakes for the Christmas party?" I think the most amusing part is the student who said "Neither" but sat there and cut and glued with the rest of us. I think they are some pretty cool 3-D snowflakes. I'd like to add a little glitter to them later. You can find the instructions here.

My supervisor and I are toying with the idea of starting a choir or a glee club at lunchtime. Maybe once a week? Eventually I'd like to teach a choir or a music class, but I have to do a lot of work to establish myself there with the students before I can create that class. And it would have to be separate from art and theatre (which starting next year I'd like to separate as well). Thanks to the new testing in Texas, we won't be able to accelerate out students towards graduation. Which is a tragedy. So with two or three teachers we need to create some more elective options to keep the kids interested. So why not add a choir? Oh yeah. I've got to bribe them into singing in front of people.

I used the field trip tomorrow as a reminder to students on behavior. One of my students got suspended this week, so he can't go now. All I said? "Don't do anything stupid."

Day Fifty-nine: Hope you know...

I had a hard day. It was long. It was stressful. I thought I had prepared so well. I started off running late when I had a meeting for this week's assembly. I hadn't been able to get a hold of the speaker we were hoping for this week. I'll be gone Friday on the field trip and everyone looked at me like it was my responsibility to fix it. (One of those "I'm only in charge when there is a problem" moments). My supervisor went to bat for me and when I finally found out the speaker could not come before January, he offered to tell the principal so I didn't have to.

With each class I went through a presentation on a few different styles of art along with a few principles of design. After that we went to the computer lab to research more on our own to create their own project based on a line from the play we read. The assignment? I wrote it out on the board as follows:

-Pick a line

-Look at pretty pictures

-Tell me what you're going to do

-Tell me what materials you'll need

My 3rd period class took FOREVER to settle down. With the rest it took about 10-15 minutes before we went over to the computer lab. They took 45 minutes. I need to go back and do a little more reinforcing of coming to class and being ready to get to work.

I knew I needed to leave a few minutes early to go to an appointment. I'd cleared everything with my principal. With the craziness of the day, and then a meltdown 6th period, I totally spaced it and didn't leave until over 30 minutes after I meant to be long gone. Oops.

Now as to what actually happened at the end of the day. One of my students got upset and walked out. He's come a long way with me and usually comes to my class more than once a day. He feels safe there I guess. So after I took the rest of the students to the computer lab and checked with the teacher there, I went and found the student sitting in the hallway. I sat down next to him and calmly said, "I know you don't want to drop my class. I know that you are upset about something and it's not about me. What's up?" He then started to tell me about some very upsetting news he had found out and was trying to deal with. All I can say is that it really sucks. And I told him that. I reminded him that I'm not okay with him taking his anger out on me, but that if he lets me know what's going on, I can be sensitive to it. "Ready to come back to class?" "Yeah." Phew. Then after-school he couldn't find his backpack and was freaking out that someone stole it.

We found out later that one of his friends had taken it just to mess with him and gave it back.

Day Fifty-eight: Ask and ye shall receive

Sometimes our efforts to teach our students appropriate vocabulary should stop before it starts. The principal had the artificial Christmas tree brought to our class and a few students tried to put some lights on it. I realized that the second strand was on the tree backwards because the plug end wasn't at the bottom. We had unwrapped the bottom strand when I picked the ends up, demonstrated, and said, "Make sure you plug the male end into the female end...yes that is what it's called." Oh the embarrassment.

First two classes were very quiet today. Less than five students per class. A few extra came by 2nd period to talk about Christmas party planning. Then 3rd was crazy. The class is now my largest. I know, most teachers would love to have a class with only 15 students...let me remind you that you kicked these 15 students out of your class. A few students thought I was picking on them for not working while letting others get away with it. They didn't seem to recognize that since the last time I checked on them, I had said the same thing at every table I stopped at. They are so funny. In the midst of all of this one of my students came up and told me an idea she had for her next project. It was so cool to see her so excited about what she was going to make, to see the wheels in her head turn and then click into place.

In 4th the students were writing down a key moment from each scene. It's not a math class, so there are a lot of answers that could be correct. I talked to them about taking on the role of a director, and how you get to decide what is most important to communicate...you just had to be able to defend your choice. So a student would tell me he was done, bring me his paper, and I would choose a scene and ask why he chose that line. I know the play pretty well, so it was pretty easy to spot the totally random sentences. I then said, go back, read the scene, come back, and tell me why it is important. Then he'd change something, but I'd see the same line still there, ask the same question, and get the same response. What a relief when he finally could answer the question and make connections with what he read. More than just regurgitating information.

Last night and today I got some very good news, thanks to some tremendous generosity. There is a fairly well known comedian that has done a few specials on Comedy Central who will be doing a show here in a few months. I got this crazy idea in my head about seeing if I could get a few tickets donated as a reward for my students. So I contacted his publicist. What's the worst that could happen? He'd say no? Last night I opened my email to find out that he was donating 4 tickets to us. How cool is that? When I told my students, they were so excited and are already asking what they need to do to get the tickets. I told them I'd let them know how it would work by Friday. Any suggestions????? P.S. I think I was able to get a few tickets for my students to see The Nutcracker as well.

Day Fifty-seven: Is this really happening?

Ah Monday. Finally got the bus situation straightened out. So we've got a bus. And a driver. And a place to go. And permission slips coming in. I'm still using the permission slips as a bribe to get students to do their work, and a few worked harder today as a result to get one. They know time is running out. Today one student changed his mind about going. I knew he would. The other day he told me he didn't want to go since he gave himself one chance to get a permission slip and didn't get one. Weird. Anyway. I told him that he just had to make progress the next day and he wouldn't have it. He was out. But reality is setting in. And he got to work today after saying, "Forget it, I want to go now."

The assignment for today:

For each scene in Sangre de un Angel, write down one sentence or phrase of dialogue that you think represents a key moment in the scene.

Some students barely wrote down one all period. One student finished in about 15 minutes, and had great answers. She's kind of a rock star, but got a little self-conscious when I pointed out to other students that she was already done. "Don't tell them what I'm doing. They can't be like me." Note to self...more one on one reinforcement. She came by later that day to say hi, so I think we're still good.

I spent my conference period having a Christmas party planning meeting with a few students who really wanted to be involved. We outlined the layout of the room and put together a wish list of supplies and decorations. We're hoping to get a tree donated that we can decorate and take to a family in need in our school. Anyone want to donate a few dollars so we can get some fake snow? :)

Today I also heard something I can't write about on here. It happens every once in a while. As a teacher, I battle with balancing privacy laws with the responsibility to share what it is like to work with the students I teach. I will, however, share how I handled it. I'm usually a stickler for things like cell phone rules. At the beginning of class I told my class that one of the students "...is having a rough day. So I'm not going to get on his case today, and won't say anything if his cell phone is out. Rules still apply for the rest of you." Most of them had heard something about the situation and didn't question it. He was quieter and more cagey than usual, which is saying something. Scared of anyone walking too close behind him. On top of that he just found out he didn't pass one of his TAKS tests, so he still can't graduate. It's been a discouraging week for him. Maybe someday I can share his story.

Day Fifty-six: Rewards

So I'll be honest. It's been a long couple of days. Wednesday was a late night with graduation. Last night I had a dress rehearsal for a choir I am in that ran late. Suffice it to say that I was so tired this morning my brain could not process anything and I knew I'd be screwed when my students walked in.

So, before all pandemonium broke out, I decided to make today the day I followed through on a promise. I had promised my students a pizza party for the first class to get everyone to 5 points. The rest I promised a class period in the game room when their class made it. It gave me a chance to bond with my students and get to know them better. So my first two classes got a bit of a break. By third period I was back on my game and went back to my classroom. We played a three round version of charades that we did a few months ago in my next two classes. The students got really into it, worked together, were much better at the round where they could only use one word to help their team guess, and even willingly did some impressive pantomime in the final round.

I also totally killed my students at ping pong (I normally don't think of myself as very good). Should I let them win? They kept lining up to try anyway. I wonder if beating them is a let down, or if it earns their respect.

No word yet on whether I have a driver for the field trip next week. Some one was out today so I have to wait until Monday.

Day Fifty-five: Bloody Murder

Today I ran out of my class screaming for the first time. Why you ask?

A baby gecko had found it's way into my doorway, a student had picked it up, and was chasing after me with it.

How is it that I am not afraid of kids that have been arrested, but I'm terrified of a tiny lizard?

My first class spent time taking down decorations from graduation last night. I think htey wanted to keep some of them.

When second period started, I only had two students. No idea where everyone was. I think some were taking the ASVAB. So I tried a little experiment. Wait, isn't every day an experiment? I taught them about flash mobs (can you believe most of these kids have never heard of them before?) So we watched an example, and then I had them try out a way of creating one. The two students that were there are probably the most shy I have all day. Probably the only time I could get them to try this out when no one else was watching. I had each of them figure out a way to spell their name in the air, using a different body part for each letter. A little graffiti in the air if you will that ended up looking like an interpretive dance. Then they learned the other student's name as well as mine, and we put the three together. One student loved it, the other was still embarrassed. But we had so much fun, especially when we tried to add music and experiment with different songs.

3rd period was weird. One student I have 3rd and 4th and he's normally great. Something was up and he did not want anything to do with what we were doing. He talked back and shut down. So weird. By the end of the period, I had three or four pairs of students that had put together their own mini performance. And when 4th period came around, that same student that fought it 3rd period was one of the first to start working on his second chance. We really had a blast. Some of the students really got into it. Yeah, I told you it was going to be cool. Even my last class enjoyed it. These are the same students who two and a half months ago would not stand up when I asked them to were drawing letters in the air with their elbows, foreheads, and feet...in front of the rest of the class.

At the end of 3rd period my phone rang. It was my principal. "Hey babycakes. So the next graduation in December 14th. Aren't you glad I gave you more warning this time?"

I'm having a little field trip drama. Mostly red tape. We have a bus but no driver to pick us up. I found a job coach that is cleared to drive and available, but I'm now waiting on approval from someone in central administration to let him help us out. Fingers crossed.

Day Fifty-four: Congrat(ulation)s

I can't believe I forgot to write about this yesterday. At the beginning of 6th period, one of my students walked in late. I turned to him and asked simply, "Why are you late?" With a straight face and in complete earnestness he said, "I had to bust a few n****as in the face." I started laughing so hard I almost fell on the floor. "Well thank you for your honesty. Have a seat."

At several moments today, people thought I was crazy. My students. Other teachers. And understandably so. First I had traced "Congratulations" and "Graduates" on two separate sheets of black butcher paper. I was super rushed, and realized I had not left enough room for the "s" on "Congratulations." Oops. I decided to start cutting out the "Graduates" first. Took forever (I was also trying to teach, get students involved with helping with other decorations, etc.), but once I started putting blue tissue paper behind it, I got excited. I was going to try to add the "s" on the end of the other, but realized it was too long for the area on the wall it was supposed to cover. So I put the "s" to make "Congrats" instead and called it good. You could still see some of the white pencil from the rest of the word. I tried to erase it but it didn't work so well. Luckily you couldn't notice from the audience. Later, we were setting up in the cafeteria, and some other teachers had come in to help hang up the backdrop I had made to go behind the stage. It was mostly in pieces, and there were some sections of black butcher paper I needed hung up high to cover the areas above the words. They were rolling their eyes a little, but reluctantly played along. They didn't understand the Christmas lights I was putting under the paper. One teacher thought it wasn't going to work and it was going to catch on fire. Then we put up "Congrats" and the entire feeling in the room changed. The lights shined through creating a twinkly effect. After that everyone's attitude changed and became really helpful.

I wish I got a better shot, but here's what the wall behind the stage looked like:

The students deserved something nice. And the graduation was so inspiring. 30 students beating the odds and finishing high school. For each graduate, a teacher would go up, say a few words about the student, and then read their name. I started thinking of students whose names I wanted to read someday at their own graduation. I wanted more than anything to see them through. As long as it takes.

Day Fifty-three: Flip side

And this is why we are grateful for the lessons we learn. Like not taking things personally. The same kids that yesterday were so impossible today were totally cooperative and working hard. Maybe it's something in the air. The weather changing usually affects their behavior. So I was very relieved that even though I forgot to set my alarm last night and overslept by 20 minutes, that my day was pretty good. I had some students start helping me make decorations for graduation tomorrow while others worked on completing their assignments from yesterday.

One student was really trying hard to work today. I've been holding permission slips ransom (carrot, ransom, same difference), promising the students that I will hand them out to those who are following directions and working in class. We had the following conversation:

Student: This is hard.

Teacher: Yeah. It is hard.

Student: Are you mocking me?

Teacher: Nope. Character analysis is hard stuff.

I asked him some questions to help guide his work, and gave him a permission slip at the end of class.

Yesterday I sketched a design for graduation. No real time to buy stuff, so we'll see how it all comes together. I'm running a little behind where I wanted to be, but we made a bunch of stars to hang from the ceiling. First thing tomorrow I'll start on the decorations for the front wall.

Day Fifty-two: Manic Monday

I think today started off on the wrong foot. And then found another wrong foot.

Was it the empty gas tank this morning and finding I left my credit card at home?

The email telling me that I had to have my students back by 1:45pm from our field trip next week? (Our tour of the museum starts at 2pm, and they are the ones paying for the buses in the first place)

The graduation on Wednesday night that I have to set up and design decorations for?

Or once the day started...

My first period class refusing to read so I had to skip to the next assignment?

My second period class where one of my best students insisted on lying on the table and taking a nap?

My third period class where a student hit another with a hanger when my back was turned?

The girls I walked by in the hallway that were about to throw down at the end of lunch?

My fourth period class that I had to give assigned tables to hoping they would do more working than hair pulling or bullying/flirting?

A few students did not come to 6th period today, but guess what? The ones that did all worked today. I'd go check on them periodically, and smiled to see they were making progress.

A few do's and don'ts I learned today about working with this particular student population:

Do remember the small victories.

Don't take it personally. A lot of teenagers are angry. It's not you. You just happen to be there.

Do get creative and be flexible.

Don't try role work. I tried to introduce them to character analysis in role as a psychologist. They just got angry and said, "Ugh, stop talking like that!"

Day Fifty-one: Nuh uh. Yeah huh.

I walked in this morning and saw my first period frequent ditcher in the cafeteria. He wanted to know if we were going to "read that play again." Now this is the guy in my first period that yesterday was laughing about how few days he's actually come to my class. How many times he's either ditched or been in SMARTS. He's only in school because if he doesn't come he'll get arrested. (Quite a few students have attending school as part of their probation, so it's a fairly common motivation that doesn't always work). Back to the story at hand. Then one of the students across the table from him that kept trying to get out of my class 3rd period yesterday asked if his class had finished. I told him they did. I was expecting them to want to do something else. To say, "I don't want to read that stupid play. Nevermind." Or for the kid in 3rd to be relieved we were done. My classes that are finished I had planned on doing some games with today but his class was taking a lot longer to read and kept talking between every line, so I said, "Probably." Then he said, "Okay. I don't want to go to SMARTS today. I'll come to class. I did good yesterday." Excuse me while I pick myself up off the floor.

Once in class the guys complained a few times about having to read a lot (the class is small, so they do have to read more). Here's the thing...they kept reading anyway. I had to struggle not to laugh.

Fourth period four students never made it to class. Their behavior has been escalating. I know they think they are flirting, but still too emotionally immature to express that so they basically bully each other.

The conversation usually goes like this when there is a problem:

Me: Just walk away.

Student: ....

Me: Or are you trying to flirt with her?

Student: No, I'm going to hit her.

Me: ....

When one of the boys resorted to pulling a girl's hair I drew the line. What are we, in kindergarten? They all stayed to talk to the principal. I have no idea what happened, but none of them made it back to my class today.

My 6th period class was really disappointed today. One of the students that was supposed to be in the skit today at the assembly didn't show up for school today. We talked about having someone else fill in, but everyone agreed that he was the funniest part and we couldn't do it without him. So we'll try again next week.

Day Fifty: Payback

Yesterday was awesome. Today started out interesting when my principal popped in to see how I was doing. He was very encouraging. He heard good things about my evaluation yesterday and was impressed with the way I was gaining my students' trust. He also told me he had really wanted to hire a new teacher, not someone who had been doing things the same way for 20 years and unwilling to adapt. So I guess my feeling like I'm always making things up is a good thing?

But let's really get down to what today was about--Today I ate humble pie.

So glad my evaluation was yesterday, and not today. Much of my day was almost like a nightmare. It took forever to get kids to read today. They would be disrespectful and not want to work, then ask if we could go outside or to the game room. Fourth period was especially hard. I kept thinking, "Why did I give you a pizza party yesterday?" I did learn something pretty interesting though. One of my tougher students was reading the part of Angel. To get attention, he would pause before he was supposed to read, clear his throat, then finally read the line. EVERY LINE. At first I tried to tell the other students just to ignore it so he'd stop. No dice. So when he was taking too long, without saying a word, I started reading his part before he could. Didn't take more than a few lines for him to realize what was going on. Instead of saying he didn't want to read anyway, he started reading his lines without creating a scene. Small victory.

Then 6th period rolled around. Most of the class wanted to be in the skit for the assembly, and we had so much fun putting it together. I was so impressed with their creativity, and the use of props. Even the same empty box became a hiding place, a house, and a car. They seem really excited about performing tomorrow. It was just what I needed at the end of a tough day of teaching. I loved seeing them take ownership.

Day Forty-nine: Evaluation

So for those who are starting in part-way through on this journey, there are a few things you should know. Obviously there is a lot I can't share on here, including the school I work at. What I can say is that I teach theatre and art at an alternative high school working with students that many teachers and administrators gave up on.

Today was my first official teaching evaluation. I had no idea it was coming. My AP walked in at the beginning of class, sat down, and started taking notes before I realized what had happened. Did I mention that I figured out what I was doing today during 6th period yesterday?? I've been holding on to Sangre de un Angel for a while, waiting for the students to be ready to read it. I felt they finally could do it. I spent a few minutes at the beginning using the lights in the class to explain creating a setting as well as going over stage directions. Can you believe I had every student in my 3rd period class reading? Out loud? Together? They made me look so good. The AP said it's one of the best classes he's observed in a long time.

Fourth period got a pizza party and time in the game room during lunch and through class. They ate pizza, played pool and ping pong, and hung out.

Sixth period decided they wanted to put together a skit on gang violence for the assembly on Friday. Let's run with it! In the meantime, we made a list of the top ten reasons to stay out or get out of a gang and started figuring out who would be in each one. So we're putting off reading the play in that class until next week.

Day Forty-eight: Post-mortem

Today was so amazing. Perfect? Absolutely not. My fourth period class is definitely a challenge. I have a few students I'm talking to the counselor about separating. However...

Today I had the students write out everything they did to help with the haunted house, along with how many points they thought they should get for it. Then on the other side of the paper, I asked them to respond to a few questions: What do you think worked/went well? What could we improve for next time? (be specific) What else could we do that you think the school would enjoy?

At the beginning of third period, one of my students walked out without saying anything. I had to call the office to let them know, and was supposed to send him up to the office when he returned. When he came back, I asked him to step outside really quick so I could find out what was going on. Before I said anything, I said, "It's okay. I just want to know what's going on. Have I ever gotten in your face?" No. So I asked him what was up. Right before class, someone accused him of being a snitch and he just needed to walk. I told him just to let me know what was up next time. Or if you don't want to tell me and just need a moment, lie to me. Tell me you need to go to the restroom. He was fine the rest of the time and wrote out responses to all of the questions, much to the shock of my supervisor who stopped by to see how things were going only to find all my students working.

The girl I gave student of the month to stopped by and I gave her her certificate and new ID. She said her mom didn't believe it. She didn't believe it. I told her she deserved it for showing so much improvement. I found out later (from a teacher that overheard) that she was in the hallway and someone said something to her about her winning, not believing it either. Apparently she pulled it out and showed it off with a big smile on her face.

During 6th period I was talking to one of my shyer students about his credit. He's the one who ended up being totally awesome during the haunted house. He asked if he could have a credit for theatre instead of art. I asked why. "If I go to another high school, I don't want to have to take a theatre class and do any acting." First, another school couldn't force him to take theatre, he just needed to take one fine arts class to graduate. It didn't matter if it was art or theatre (or music for that matter). Then I told him I didn't think he should underestimate himself. I went through what students are supposed to know how to do in a theatre class (good old TEKS), listed how what he did at the haunted house on Friday exactly fit in with it, and what a great job he had done at it. He got this huge smile on his face. "Yes I did."

I don't know if there are many things better for a teacher than a student realizing that they did something great, all by themselves.