Day Fifteen: Thank you

I had a rough weekend. I came in to work this morning with a few things weighing on me. When I walked out of my class I ran into one of the other teachers in the hallway. She asked if I was okay and said I looked like I was sad. And if she could see it, the kids would see it. And if the kids saw it…. So I went back into my room for a few minutes, took a deep breath, and tried again. Time to lose myself in helping my kids.

First period is more of the same. One student has been missing a lot, another is coming but not wanting the work. The rest are content working away at building and painting. I need to teach them some design and technical theatre. I think they'll love it.

Later I had my other classes warm up with Ghosts in the Graveyard, then introduced them to image work. They were slow and unwilling in 2nd period, so I pulled out the dreaded Powerpoint and warned them that we could learn things the fun way, or the boring way. They were groaning five slides or so in and begging me to stop. I did a little more for good measure. Then went on to teach them about image work (kind of like creating human statues). The other classes were more willing and open and actually created a group image , taking turns adding to or replacing other students from the image. One class worked together creating an image of "The Streets" while another did "My House." There is an underlying violence in each of the ideas which is really interesting.

During my 5th period conference, I noticed a student in the hallway I had seen a few minutes earlier and figured that he was wondering around. I popped out and said, "Go to class." He ignored me and kept walking. So I walked along beside him. Then I asked for his name, then to see his ID. Kept walking. So I said I'd just keep walking with him. I asked where his class is. He said I'd find out when he walked in. I kept walking. And smiling. Then he stopped and introduced himself. He apologized and thanked me for the assembly on Friday. He that even though there were other students who did not take it seriously and laughed watching the planes hit the tower, it meant a lot to him. He lost somebody that day. When I asked he said he didn't like to talk about it, but mumbled something about an uncle. My heart broke for him, and I was reminded of how important what we do is. And we may not reach them all, but we can reach someone.

Day Fourteen: Day of Service and Remembrance

So I should probably clarify that the in-school suspension is referred to as SMARTS.

This morning, I had the following conversation with a student.

Me: Are you planning on finishing your project today so you can do improv with us?

Student: If I'm not in SMARTS.

Me: [Cue incessant laughter]

Student: What? [I laugh even harder]. No, I'm serious!

Me: I know, that's why it's so funny.

I found out that I am getting a girl in my 1st period class. Help us all.

I felt completely scatterbrained in my third period class. I was scrambling to answer student questions, set up for an assembly, talk with my supervisor, and get students started on an activity. Kaboom. On my wish list for next year? Conference during the period before assemblies. Not a life and death change that I couldn't live without. It would just be nice.

Our assembly today was about September 11th. Not the exciting entertaining or fast paced even like last week. Somber and serious. We started with this tribute:

We then shared some facts and statistics about 9/11. Many of these students had not even reached Kindergarten when it happened, and I was very proud of two of my students who read these in front of the school. Here is part of the full list, which can be found in an article in NY Magazine:

Death, destruction, charity, salvation, war, money, real estate, spouses, babies, and other September 11 statistics.

The initial numbers are indelible: 8:46 a.m. and 9:02 a.m. Time the burning towers stood: 56 minutes and 102 minutes. Time they took to fall: 12 seconds. From there, they ripple out.

• Total number killed in attacks (official figure as of 9/5/02): 2,819
• Number of firefighters and paramedics killed: 343
• Number of NYPD officers: 23
• Number of Port Authority police officers: 37
• Number of WTC companies that lost people: 60
• Number of employees who died in Tower One: 1,402
• Number of employees who died in Tower Two: 614
• Bodies found "intact": 289
• Body parts found: 19,858
• Number of families who got no remains: 1,717

I also shared with them the experiences of a family who recently lost their home in the recent fires. I edited it so it would be appropriate for school, but I highly recommend reading it yourself.

I introduced my students to a game called Quelf. I offered them 10 points just for playing, and another 10 if anyone won. It's normally a party game, but it uses skills so important to theatre. Working together, thinking quickly, creativity, story-telling, improvisation, listening, etc. Basically I tried to trick them into trying things they had been unwilling to try when in class normally. Often they would draw a card and take the penalty (going back 1-3 spaces) before doing anything potentially embarrassing, but I few of them totally went for it.

One of my students who didn't want to do the project came up to me before class and said, "I'm doing all my assignments so I can get credit for more than one class!!" Congratulations my friend. You've finally figured out how it works. The counselor told him that he could get credit for art, then get credit for theatre. It really is such a different model, but so good for these kids. And I keep telling them the same thing. The only way out is through. Put in the time. Put in the work. Get the credit. Graduate high school. Have more hope for a better future.

I really do love being a teacher. I'm developing talents I didn't know I had, facing shortcomings I wasn't expecting, and seeing people in a whole new light.

Day Thirteen: I Saw That

Morning Assembly. One of my students finally led the pledge AND spoke loud enough to be heard. Yay!

1st period. These boys. I tell ya. We're talking about September 11th and all they want to do is build the Twin Towers. At least they agreed to paint them. Why do I make plans? I did have a student refuse to take his headphones out when I was talking to them. School policy is that they are not allowed in class unless the teacher allows them. I've been letting them use them while working individually, but it's just rude to have them in when talking to people.

Most of the day today is a blur. I was so exhausted. So were some of my students and several other teachers. One teacher told me that usually happens during short weeks. I had students that were finished with their projects help create things we could put on the wall in the cafeteria during assembly on September 11th. I may have cried a little this morning watching some video clips I plan on showing tomorrow. I showed one to my first period and they said, "Turn it off, I'm going to cry!"

I have a few students that catch the city bus, so I let them leave a few minutes early to catch it. It only runs every 30 minutes, so I cut them some slack, especially since so many of them work after they get out of school. Today, I went to look outside my door to see what time was on the clock out there and saw that there was about a minute left. At that moment, I saw one girl I had been letting go early walk through the hallway and out the side door. I pointed at her, called her name, and let her know that I was no longer letting her leave early.

Progress reports are due tomorrow, and I just finished with grades. Today I had 3 new students show up, and as I was entering grades noticed several more I haven't met yet that I will need to enter (make up) tomorrow.

Day Twelve: Still Here. Still Smiling.

Ah first period. Such funny kids. A few of them were dragging their feet getting to work, but came back later in the day when they were sent to in school suspension. I made a deal with them that I challenged the other classes to. First class that gets all their students to 50 points gets a pizza party. Yes I will risk a little friendly competition. Besides, some of my classes have only 6 kids so I won't be out much when they win. I'm hoping that the stronger students will help motivate the others that have been lagging behind.

It seemed to help one of the boys in 2nd period. Half the class continued their projects while the rest helped me look through information about 9/11 for an assembly on Friday. It's amazing how much teenagers don't know about what happened or how it affects them today. It helped bring up a few good conversations. And yes, I do get excited when students will discuss ANYTHING with me. Oh wait, did you just answer a question?! Oh my goodness, did you just ASK me a question?! I think we need to have a party and celebrate.

Third period I have a really hilarious student. He doesn't want to do any art, just theatre. The rest of the class is working on their art projects, but he prefers playing with popsicle sticks and telling me he's not going to do anything. I let him know that he had the choice between joining everyone else, or I'd send an email and let the AP know what was going on. He's a good kid, just thinks that being a good kid allows him to be above the law. Then I told him I wasn't going to let him start doing theatre until he finished the project. I know. I'm evil. Right as I was telling him I was going to email the AP, the AP himself walked in the door. He likes to pop in classes, make sure the boys have their shirts tucked in (part of the dress code) and check to see how things are going. Apparently he is afraid of the AP. He went over and got to work, then begged me not to email him. I said, "I won't have to. As long as you keep working, there's no reason for me to say anything to him." Pretty simple deal.

As with everything else, I'm learning to enjoy things while they last. Mr. I Don't Want to Do Art Only Theatre got to work today, but who knows what will happen tomorrow. The young man that I had a great breakthrough with last week with his mom when he wrote a beautiful poem was the one who disappeared yesterday when my back was turned. I need to find a way to remind him that I support him and am here to help him succeed.

Another student I lent a copy of Sangre de un Angel to read and give me her opinion of after she finished her project. At the end of class, she asked if she could bring it back later. I guess it caught her interest. Did I mention she did a fantastic job on her project? She added some of her favorite quotes to her mobile and drew pictures that represented how she's feeling. I need to remember to take a picture of it tomorrow and post it.

And then there is another student who has done very little other than talk with his friends. I went by a few times to help steer him in a positive direction. He made slow but few steps. I stopped and talked to him for a little while. He told me things like "I just can't do art. I've already failed art twice." Well you are in my class now, and the only way to fail my class is to do nothing. Really. It's the only way. You don't have to be great to do well. Sure if you're talented you'll get more points and finish sooner. But I reward even trying. It may take a few more projects to earn the points, but you can totally do this. And I'm going to help you get there.

Fourth period I had a student from third period come in because he had been out a few days and wanted to get more done. Hey, he's building a plane out of popsicle sticks and it's looking pretty cool. Done and done. The rest of the class had finished so we watched a clip and used it as an introduction to evaluating performances, opinions, and the elements of drama.

Sixth period a few students were absent, while others were getting antsy. I had a fascinating conversation with some of the students. Have I made it clear that learning respect is important? One of my students was like, "Miss, do you realize what kind of kids go here?" I laughed. "Yes, yes I do." All the more reason to stick to my guns. My favorite part of the conversation was not what was said, but that the students were showing me respect (and I was showing them respect) while we were talking about it. I told them that if I taught them nothing else, I hoped to teach them how to treat people, to teach them things that will help them be successful in life. He asked me if I was going to stick around or quit, telling me that a few teachers last year left.

Nope. Not going anywhere. I told him that I like it here. And I'm not going to give up on them.

Day Eleven: Leave Them Alone and They'll Come Home

Students really are so very different. Figuring out what they need and how to motivate them is an art. Some do well if I stop by periodically to help them get back on track. But the young man in my 2nd period? I let them know at the beginning of class that we're moving on tomorrow so the projects should be finished today. He then makes a comment about not working, I ignore it, he gets to work, and finishes his project before the class is half over. Similar sequence of events with a girl in my 4th period. Gave me a lot of attitude on Friday, but I was nice and polite to her when bringing her folder to her and ignored her the rest of the time. Doesn't work for all of them, but more evidence for me in coming to understand your students.

Made the mistake of rinsing out a paintbrush today. When my back was turned, one of my students disappeared, along with the bathroom pass. I realized he was gone pretty quickly, called the office, and found out he was already there. Caught in the act.

I'm really struggling to be motivated to write today. I left early today when I found out a fire broke out a few miles from my apartment to go pack up the essentials. Several fires are burning in and around the city, one of which is still completely out of control. At least three teachers at my school lost their homes by lunchtime today, more had been evacuated. Two friends of mine had parents lose their homes and everything in them. They only had a five minute warning to get out.

Day Ten: Renewed

I'll be honest.  I started out the day a little discouraged.  The circus of 6th period weighed on me.  Then I took a deep breath and reminded myself that the reason that these students are here is because there has not been a teacher who has gotten through to them.  ANY victory or progress with these students is to be celebrated and remembered.

The first few periods were CRAZY.  Not because my students were out of control, but because the Spanish/P.E. teacher brought his class in as well.  They were performing a skit for the assembly today and he wanted me to help work with them on their performances.  Not a lot of time, but enough to help it to work.  They were going over the nonnegotiables on our campus in short little scenes.  I think mine and everyone else's favorite part came from my suggestion that during the one on fighting, one of the students punch out the coach.  They laughed so hard when he hit the floor, and if we didn't have their attention yet, we had it then.

The student I had the cell phone situation with last week is continuing to come around.  He stopped by today and asked about this powerpoint he showed me that he wanted to add stuff to.  He also apologized for last week.  He said that he had seen others take phones but not return them as promised.  He realized that for good and bad, I had been keeping my word and following through.

4th period?  She's in in-school suspension for a while.  Apparently I'm not the only teacher she doesn't like.

A few of the boys from first period stopped by with one of the O5ers who is no longer in my class.  He told me, "Hey, I'm not in your class anymore."  I let him know any points he earned I would hold on to, as well as his folder, for when he came back.  The other boys were just saying hi, and I couldn't help smiling inside.  They love to act so tough sometimes, but they were just so precious I almost teared up.

Ah, 6th period.  I cam ready for them today.  I found the most boring powerpoint I could on the elements of design and told them that for not working I was going to have them watch it and take notes.  After a lot of groans, they begged and pleaded and promised to work.  The worst offender yesterday was put in in-school suspension for a while, so I took them at their word and let them off.  However, I did not let them off in regards to the young lady who had been distracting half of them all week.  I had her sit up front at the desk alone and told them that anyone who talked to her would lose 5 points.  And if she talked to anyone she would lose 5 points.  One student was penalized fairly quickly, and they cooperated after that.  They assumed her deal was a result of an agreement with the VP.  Heh.  Didn't tell them it was just me experimenting with classroom management.  After about 15 minutes, she said "I've been good, can I go over there now?"  Nope.  Maybe if the rest of today goes well, we'll reconsider on Tuesday.  She frowned but went back to her seat.  She managed to survive the rest of the period, and get work done, and didn't prevent others from working, so I gave her the last 2 minutes of class to talk with them again.  I made sure to tell her from the beginning that this was not about punishing her, it was about wanting to help her and others do well in the class.  All of this was to be temporary, until we all got back on track with how things were going last week.  I ended my day with renewed confidence.

And we keep moving forward!

Day Nine: You Mean I Get Paid for This?

The first half of the day today was magical (even if there were a few sad moments).

1st period was so quiet today. Lesson learned: If you have a room full of boys, give them some sticks and some glue. Maybe some paint. It's like they turn into little boys playing with models and legos. I had one moment where I was a little horrified and heartbroken. The O5er in 1st that was really defiant last week was respectful and working yet again today. He started telling me about how he used to paint houses. He also told me he got in a fight with his dad. Not the kind of fight that we normally have with our parents. He also told me that he slept at a bus stop for a few weeks at one time. No way to know if it's true or not. And you wonder why I fight so hard to have at least my classroom be a safe place for these kids.

2nd period? So much better. The student that I had the confrontation with yesterday was totally fine today. He's getting closer to finishing school, so maybe something sunk in? He said he's going to do all his work because he wants to graduate. No idea if anything I said or did helped, or if it was something else. What I do know is that nothing is more motivating than self-motivation. He is at a point where he is driven to succeed not because of a reward he is going to get today, but for a long term hope of a better life.

3rd period I had a first. I told the students that they had 20 more minutes to work, and a few of the students were upset...because they wanted class to be LONGER. I even had a student ask if he could come at lunch to keep working, and another ask if she could come 6th period when she doesn't have a class. Can someone tell me what they put in the breakfast this morning?

4th period my girl that finally worked yesterday shut down today. Didn't want to work. Apparently class is boring...because none of her friends are in there. So, I left her alone again.

6th period turned into a zoo. What on earth happened? Had to send two students to the office after they were RUNNING through the room while others were using scissors. I have a parent/teacher conference with the boy and his mom tomorrow morning. It will definitely be interesting. In the midst of everything one of the boys snuck out of the room and walked outside the side door to the school. Luckily I was able to talk him back inside. Ah the joys.

P.S. I got my first paycheck yesterday!